Past and Present
A reflection on the climb from uncertainty to achievement, and the many peaks that still lie ahead.
| Past | Present |
|---|---|
| The screen blurred in front of me Tears spill on the worksheet It’s 3 in the morning and still I have 15 more questions and 15 more days For an exam which Everybody says Will decide my fate ‘Forever?’ I ask Because the climb feels hard Is this what it takes to reach the peak? What will be of me? Where will I stand? Or more specifically… Where will my picture be, In those big banners outside Every day as I inch closer I wonder, I wish I could meet Future me Ask her, “Will it be worth it?” Will she hug me in joy And pat me, saying “Yes! It was!” Or would she still look at me And ask back, “Was this the right choice?” “I still have to keep running?” I wish she could hold me through this Because the climb feels hard But she would be standing at the peak Won’t she? |
The screen keeps loading For what feels like an eternity I sit with my eyes shut tight And prayer on my lips Peeked at the screen And called out to them Do I celebrate or do I worry? Is this good? No, is this good enough? 10 calls, 12 tabs and 3 conversations later I get to know Maybe it might be good enough? Good enough to be on the banners To get a respectable seat To make all our sacrifices worth it Lists of choices and preferences And finally that wonderful mail That finalizes our choice I know now where I will be And I wish I could hold my past self And tell her, “Yes! It was!” I would look at her And say, “It was the right choice” “And I’ll keep running!” Because even though the climb feels hard There are many peaks we’ve got To keep climbing up and up The sky’s never the limit |
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